Friday, July 27, 2012

Relationship Quandary

There are times when we don't have any answers for what is going on around us. As intelligent as we believe we are, as spiritually connected to God as we are, sometimes we just don't have the answers. For me this is another one of those times.

Lately I have heard several - repeat several - women say that they have been told by men that "The Lord said you are to be my wife." If it was only one man per woman I might not be in this quandary. But each of these women have had several such pronouncements. They are in different locations in this country. As many as 25 different men have approached several of these women and said the exact same thing. This seems not to be isolated incidents.

So they ask me as a man of God what is going on. Honestly I don't have a clue. The common characteristics of all of them are strikingly similar: They have a intimate relationship with God. They are faithful church attenders, including evening services and visiting other churches. By all accounts they work very closely within the context of ministry. By their own admission they are not looking for a husband at this time in their lives.They are content with their lives as it currently is and are not looking to make any major changes. They have jobs, careers, and lives outside of the church as well. There is not a lot of "down" time where they are lonely and needing company so to speak. Finally that are not crying about the lack of available men as they are approached everyday it seems.

So if it is truly God, would God tell over 25 different men to tell one woman that they were sent by God to tell her that she was to be their wife? Is God that desperate to get them off the market that He has sent an APB via the Holy Ghost out to every available man that comes within her circle to push to marry her? Are these somehow some of the final things that must happen before the Lord comes back?

You know what I really think don't you? I do not say that this comes from the Lord but from my own experiences as a man and having also been "spiritually claimed as their future husband" by several women in my life. I still shudder over being in a church service in Maryland and hearing Prophet Todd Hall telling everyone in the audience to lay their hand on that thing that they are asking God for and claim it and feeling the hands of a woman I never met in my life laid on the back of my head from the pew behind me.

This has become the latest in a set of manipulative attempts by men to get in women's pants. To use the one thing that the majority of women want (a godly husband who knows the word of God) against them so they can have sex with them. They twist the word of God to attempt to manipulate women to attack them at what is usually a very vulnerable spot. It has become another card to play in their arsenal of weaponry. If they don't fall for the regular lines, switch to this tactic. To claim the Lord's inspiration for their misguided calls and conversations. Correct me if I am wrong but if this was truly of God, would God then tell them to violate His word (have sex before marriage) which is where this scam usually ends up. If the woman gives in she is left more hurt and wounded then ever in her life.

I could be wrong. I am willing to re-educated on this. I am well aware of the adversary replicating anything that is of God so that it could potentially be one right person and 24 put up by the adversary to confuse and confound these women. However if I am right, a lot of men will be going to hell with gasoline drawers on for real.

If what happened to me, happens to these women they will become increasingly cynical over any man's attempt to converse with them on any level. This to me will be the ultimate tragedy. That they will cease to truly hear the voice of God  through any man because of the shameful exploits of those few who only wanted to sleep with them and used God's word to try to make that happen.

Beware Drinking from Poisoned Wells


Too often we form negative opinions of others based solely on the negative opinions of others. We never truly get to know people as the beautiful individuals they are because our introduction to them has been clouded by the poison of other's opinions. Sometimes it is as little as saying "I would not trust him/her because they did me wrong at some point in time" conversation.  It is an area where the poison well simply has not come to grips what with whatever has happened, forgiven them and moved forward. At the worst it is a concerted effort to try to destroy another person and any relationship that could be of value to them. It is a perpetual effort of slander and defamation on the part of the poison well. These types will not rest until they see their dire predictions of doom and despair manifested in the life of the one they are seeking to destroy.

If we are honest with ourselves, at some point in life we have either been the poison well, or have drunk from  poisoned wells. It happens in marriages, on jobs, in communities and in the churches. Every relationship in your life can be potentially ruined by poisoned wells. The challenge is to realize when you may be potentially drinking from a poison well and to spit out that poison. You are a poison well, forgiveness is the antidote. In no way am I advocating ignoring warning signs, what I am advocating is you dealing with it one on one yourself, instead of  basing your every decision in your life off the opinions of others.

Rawwwr

It is official. I am a dinosaur. The realization hit me when I was driving to pick my daughter up from her late-night shift. It was not the ...